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In-Patient Therapy Wing
These patients are kept under lock and key. They are given intensive therapy to hopefully allow them to one day become productive members of society.

The Right Side of the Web
Patient File #201 (patient is a danger to himself and society)

Enter the Right Side, and you enter a shadow world of psychosis where not everything is what it seems. Perhaps most famous for death threats to the President, The Right Side's message Wall and BBS are "a virtual Nuremburg" (WiReD magazine) where right wing loonies gather. Other portions of the site feature angry screeds claiming the January Blizzard was God's punishment of Washington, plus worshipful pages devoted to King Newt and Herr Limbaugh, and the required Whitewater pages.

Subrosa
Patient File #202 (patient may need increase in Thorazine dosage)

With the expansion of business on the Net, most people are accustomed to being able to shop online. Now, survivalists can join in this trend. While shopping for Army survival manuals and the "Ka-Bar U.S.M.C. Combat Knife" (item #MC4, a real bargain at $36.00) you can take the "Pinko-Commie" test and find out if you are a Marxist (hint: to these people, Rush Limbaugh is a Marxist).

Be Wise as Serpents
Patient File #203 (refer patient to Dr. Kevorkian for treatment)

This is the home page for a group called Be Wise as Serpents. In addition to a gorgeous 150k JPEG of their Official Throne, you get information on "Common Law: the basis for Sovereignty" as well as the required kooky anti-Semetic writings, such as an analysis of the Protocols of the Elders of Zion, and "TALMUDIC JUDAISM - Exposed: Sworn Enemy of Christianity is revealed here for all to see!" The only "thone" this guy is going to occupy is white porcelain and has a flush handle on it.

Jewish Dude with a Conservative Attitude
Patient File #204 (patient suffering from split personality)

Proving that kookiness is an equal-opportunity employer, this site shows that far-right Christians don't have the market cornered on incoherent rants and foaming at the mouth paranoia. This is the home page of the founding (and only member) of the "Jews for Buchanan" committee. In addition to supporting Pat, this site offers adds for gun paraphenalia (plus the author's bragging that he has his concealed-carry permit and "isn't afraid to use it"), stuff on how UN is taking over America's sovereignty, and the usual collection of anti-Clinton wackiness, sputtering accusations about The Liberal Controlled Media and it's "lies" and finally, a photo of the author himself, wielding his 45-calibre manhood. ("better watch yourself, Eagle-Eye, or you might get hurt!") Last but not least, as a comic touch, we have an anti-censorship ribbon, which is as out-of-place on this homepage as a round of "Hava Nigila" would be in Hitler's bunker.

Christian Identity Online
Patient File #205 (patient should be placed in restraints)

Hate has never been presented in a more folksy style by self-proclaimed "Reverend" Ronald C. Schoedel, III. The creator of this site seems friendly, has a nice "down-home" attitude, and talks about many honest, "common-sense" solutions to our problems. Like the Jews, for example. Following the grammatically incorrect link "The Jewry Exposed" (come on, guys, at least Hitler used proper grammar!) you can find out all the dirt on those evil subhumans and their "Synagogues of Satan." There is also information on a "Christianity" that bears little resemblance anything Jesus taught. Christian Identity is the religion of the Freemen in Montana, so if you are interested in what they believe, this is the site to visit.

David Duke for Senate
Patient File #206 (patient returning for more treatment)

Like a bad meal that you still taste 8 hours later, David Duke is tanned, rested, and ready for the 1996 campaign. For those who feel that Pat Buchanan is just too slick, you can visit David's page, refreshingly inept in both HTML and presentation. Every page on the site has a title of "Untitled," probably an artifact of cluelessness with Word Internet Assistant, which a quick "View Source" tells us that the site was constructed in. But, you support Duke for his politics, not his HTML, and how! A heartfelt letter explains that he running for Senate to save our nation from "alien domination." and a 1-900 number gives his words a voice (for only $10 a pop, it is a better deal than the True-Psychic line!). The site also features position papers, Duke's "academic" writings ("My Indian Odyssey" and "Christianity and Race") and information on "The Bell Curve." Oh yes...the page background is, of course, white.

Republic of Texas Home Page
Patient File #207 (patient delusional but harmless)

This is the earnest and sincere effort of a "citizen of the Republic of Texas." While everything on this page is totally out-of-the-world, the author clearly does not know that, and he wants so hard to believe everything on the page is true that you feel sorry for him. The gist of the page is that Texas is an independent nation. It features plainative calls for immigration, recognition, and a call for volunteers for the Judicial Affairs Committee among others. The first paragraph of the page says it all: "The Republic of Texas has been lawfully reestablished as a free and independent nation under the law of nations. Proper lawful process has been completed and the United States, the United Nations, and all the nations of the world have been notified." Very considerate, very polite. Just hope that Texas's independence doesn't mess up the college football season!

Update: April 30 1997...It should be noted that this site is NOT the site of the group that was holed up on western Texas, rather it is the site of a related group which wants Texas independence, but is not violent.

American Family Association
Patient File #208 (patient a danger to society)

The American Family Association is a so-called "Christian" advocacy group founded by Donald Wildmon. Their professed goal is to restore American values and strengthen the family. They have discovered a threat to the American family far greater than stagnating wages, violence, poor schools, divorce, and child abuse....TV character Ellen! The rest of the AFA site is filled with shrill calls to boycott companies offering health benefits to same-sex couples (guess they will have to shut down their server -- after all, nearly all high-tech companies offer these benefits), as well as the usual finger-pointing at Godless liberals, secular humanism, and teachers of evolution.

Aryan Dating Pages
Patient File #209 (Iaughing gas needed)

It is so hard to meet people in today's cruel and heartless world. Especially if you are a sensitive, kind, and eligible Aryan looking to further the Master Race. Rather than take easy cheap shots at this site, I will just allow a satisfied client to speak for herself:
Hi, I love your pages. I'm an Aryan woman. I think you should mention the fact that there are plenty of race traitors out there. Some protect and serve non-white races at our expense. For instance, the white mechanic that messes your car up or doesn't fix it properly, on purpose. This happens to Aryan woman a lot. I suspect the men who do this are fags. I think that Aryan people need more unity.