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Out-Patient Therapy Wing Patients here are preparing to re-enter society. They are fairly harmless, though they bear watching.

The John Birch Society
Patient File #101 (patient should be heavily sedated at all times)

We are eternally at war against the One World Government, and the Dirty Reds are always banging on the doorstep when you visit this site. Of special note are selected articles from The New American magazine, featuring information on The Conspiracy in all its forms, and violent screeds against any form of environmental conservation, tolerance, and world peace.

TownHall
Patient File #102 (patient improving, but often regresses)

This is the luxury suite in the asylum. TownHall is a slick, professionally put together site that upon first glance looks ready to begin outpatient therapy. But delve deeper and you'll see this may be premature. Visit any of the forums, where you can read comments calling for the execution of homosexuals, or the impeachment of the Clintons...and you'll realize that you have visited a site on The Lunatic Fringe.

Reagan Information Interchange
Patient File #103 (patient will require more intensive therapy)

The Reagan Information Interchange's dementia is evident soon after entering. The site is run by Michael Reagan, who's mission in life is to deify his father. The section where devotees can leave birthday messages for Reagan features missives comparing Mr. Reagan to Julius Caesar, among others. Roman history buffs may consider a comparison to Commodus or Caligula more befitting. Others may consider a padded room more befitting

GOPAC
Patient File #104 (patient is in a delusional state)

GOPAC is Newt's pet organization, a political action committee that Newt uses to violate federal election laws and renew America, in that order. Well, kind of. Letting Newt "renew America" is like letting a wolf "renew" a herd of sheep! This site won't disappoint Gobbels fans, as it is filled with inaccurate propaganda, vapid "talking points," and rambling defenses of America's most unpopular politican, Newt Gingrich.

Media Disribution
Patient File #105 (patient delusional, but harmless)

This web site is half shlocky infomercial and half paranoid ranting. From here, you can order "The Clinton Chronicles" and other half-baked conspiracy videos "proving" how Clinton personally bumped off more enemies than John Gotti, was involved in several drug rings, wholesale prostitution and probably caused the baseball strike. And, in true Home Shopping Network fashion, "THESE ITEMS ARE GOING QUICKLY - GET YOURS NOW!" The page also contains other links to conspiracy sites, CIA coverups, and other such excitements. Call now, operators are standing by!

The Other Side
Patient File #106 (patient lucid but has frequent relapses)

This site features opinion columns that the "liberal press" won't print because they are "too conservative." Or perhaps it is because they are off-base, full of misinformation, and not very well-written to boot. But nope. It is a conspiracy by The Liberal Press. The site's creator, a Mark E. Howerter has written articles covering such diverse subjects as whether Hillary Clinton is a lesbian, and a secret plot by the Marines to shoot American citizens who keep firearms. The page comes complete with a Buchanan for President badge.

The Founding Fathers
Patient File #107 (patient foaming at mouth and talking to invisible people)

This site contains your average far-right kook opinions, but with an added special feature: "conversations" with our founding fathers. Apparently the webmaster here has managed to channel the ghost of a Thomas Jefferson you won't find in your history books: "Lower the cost? You're an IDIOT" quoth the faux Jefferson (debating drug policy with Clinton). Along with made-up witticisms from our founding fathers, this site contains screeds against Hillary Clinton, angry denunciations of godless liberals, pseudo-scientific rants against gays, and all of the usual right wing garbage. However, you can find that at any site on this page. But what other site can you find the 1996 Republican platform being quoted by imaginary Founding Fathers?

Restoration Communication
Patient File #108 (Delusional but not a threat to society)

Restoration Communication is a site whose primary focus is getting more conservative messages into the popular media and culture. From reading, you may assume this is just because conservatives haven't been trying, rather than the more obvious reason, which is conservative propaganda disguised as entertainment is boring! The site attempts to disprove this by showing examples of conservative media success, like a couple tiny parody magazines, "Christian" fiction which haven't even made the back shelves at Barnes and Noble, and of course "Christian" rock albums! As a Site From the Fringe, Restoration Communications also contains such phraseology as: "May we never again be seduced by liberalism's insideous charms nor be enveloped by its muderous embrace!" To top it all off, a long rant against AT&T for supporting the "gay agenda" rounds this site out!

American Times Today
Patient File #109 (Increase valium dosage by 100 mg)

What would CNN be like if it were run by the John Birch Society? It would probably contains a surreal mixture of news and paranoid conspiracy theory, kinda like this one. Where else can you find mainstream business articles ("Apple's Next OS Will Run On Intel PC's)" next to old-fashioned red-baiting disguised as news ("Atlantis Space Shuttle blasts of for Commie Mir"). In addition to all the news that's not fit to print, this site features such in-depth stories like "Clinton Impeachment Offense #1" and my favorite: "READ THIS SHOCKER! Is Hillary Jewish?" Stop the presses and pass the tranquilizers!